Thursday, 17 May 2012

Examiners are just preparing us for the Zombies

Many students around the country are currently in the midst of exams. Going through our minds everyday are 'Do they want to make us miserable?' 'Are they jealous that we're in the peak of our lives and they're past it?' 'Do they want to kill us?'. I believe that the last thing may be closest to the truth. I believe that exam boards are the ring leaders, creating an army of teen zombies ready to take over the world with.
First they break down our immune system with stress and then we're ready to be feasted on my zombies and be the carriers of the infection. Most of our bodies are young and fit (sort of) and therefore we'd make great zombies.
We'll be in an exam room, at the end of exams, immune systems down from stress, bodies knackered from fighting themselves away from the TV and sitting propped up at a desk for hours on end. Then they'll release just one zombie into the exam room and everyone will be too exhausted to be able to do anything about it and one by one everyone will become a zombie and these teams around the country will slowly take everyone down.
Apart from me. I wont be a zombie because I'm always put in a separate room... by myself, no examiner would bother putting a zombie in there and besides my examiners really get to know me, I might even consider them friends. Yesterday one knew that my Mum is a Primary School teacher and that I want to be a teacher. The only way they could know that is if they had me for GCSE and I told them. I feel a bit bad for not remembering who she was when she seemed to know a lot about me. In fact as soon as I walked into the Exams Suite she came up to me and said 'Jessica? You're in the office now because it's just us so they put us in the smallest room'. I felt a bit like I was going to be raped and she seemed rather happy to be in the small room with me. My point is here that this lady has my back and would never zombie me. So sucks to be you guys, just remember to be aware of your surroundings at all times. Even in exams. 

NUT UP OR SHUT UP <3

Sunday, 6 May 2012

Rat Zombies

This aint gonna happen. 'Zombie Virus on Mulberry St' http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0473514/
When the zombies come the infection COULD be spread by vermin but it wont turn you into rats. No. That's just wrong.
Peace out <3